Blog, Sweet Blog

I’ve got the urge to purge

Posted on: Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Mood: Supertastic
Music: T.Rex-20th Century Boy

Didn’t I warn you about the blog titles?   I’m not talking about vomiting or Bulimia, sorry.  I’m referring to this feeling I’ve had recently.  I want to move and I’ve been window shopping for a sexy, new downtown condo right next to where I get on the bus.  I want to buy a new a place with a kitchen like this…

the kitchen

and a living room like this…

the living room

and a patio like this…

the patio

Unfortunately, there are two problems with my plan.  First, me and the bank already own a townhouse and, given the current real estate market, it seems like there’s a 99% chance of no fucking way that it will sell anytime soon for anywhere near what I bought it for.  Second, these sorts of places start at about one hundred thousand American dollars more than what I paid for my place.  That sort of mortgage isn’t totally ridiculous for me, but it would be awfully hard to manage with my car payment, electrolysis, out-of-control cocaine habit, et al.

In other words, I’ve got the moves, real bad and I don’t know what to do about it.  I’ve been having the lottery winning, new condo fantasies all week.  This is the fantasy part–>

After buying the condo, I’d live simply. Maybe I’d sell my car and just take the bus and ride my bike everywhere!  Maybe I’d start a small container garden on the patio? Just me in my adorable, little apartment….reading books, drinking cocoa, yoga knitting!  In the winter, my boyfriend and I (he’s a pilot) would make love for hours by the fire.  In the summer, I’d go to the farmer’s market and throw intimate parties…with tapas and the finest Argentinian wines!   I’d go to the ballet and the theatre every.single.night!

Sounds awesome, right?  Now, I don’t actually know what tapas are or how to make them, but I’m sure they throw in a fine-living orientation and some recipes on move-in day.  With a place like that, I’m sure everything would just sort of work itself out, y’know?  The places I’m looking at are small (<1000 s.f.), but I kind of welcome the opportunity to pare down to the essentials.  Honestly, who needs books and a table saw?  I mean, really.

So, I’m just putting it out there…if anyone would like to help me out with selling my crap shack or buying a new place, I am officially accepting assistance.  Seriously though, this is a goal of mine and I’m going to try and make it a reality in the next two or three years.  After that, I’ll invite you over for whatever the hell tapas are and some classy spitting off the balcony.

3 Responses to "I’ve got the urge to purge"

Yoga knitting sounds like a high-risk enterprise. I keep picturing a sudden slip resulting in a needle lodged up a nostril. Perhaps you better trade the pilot for a doctor.

I’ll take the pilot.

I don’t do anything that isn’t high risk because I live for the danger. I guess it’s not as sexy as it sounds.

Doctor, pilot, Mexican wrestler, bull fighter, whatever.

[…] like to refinance or sell my place…at some point.  I wrote about this before.  I’m not looking for some giant Barbie dream house in the suburbs or a penthouse on Peyton […]

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Hi, I'm Anna and I love cheese!

This blog is a chronicle of my life and a catalog of happy ephemera. The About page has a little bit more information, but, remember, none of this is really's just a supplement, a thumbnail sketch, a mostly anonymous Intarwebs placeholder. I'm way better/less wordy in person. :-)

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